Lounge Cocktail: Autumnal Equinox
It is never to late to celebrate anything!

• 2 oz Port
• 1 oz Grand Marnier
• 1/2 oz Amaretto

Instructions:
Fill Old Fashioned Glass or a Nice New Glass with ice. Pour ingredients into glass and stir.

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Observations

What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together?
100 people who don't do dick.

Define "Egghead:"
What Mrs. Dumpty gives to Humpty.

What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo."

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half mast?
They're hiring.

When 100 white men chased one black man, we called it the Ku Klux Klan; today they call it the PGA TOUR.

Submitter by Mike H., Chicago IL
Cleaned up by The B.K. Lounge censors

••••••••••••••••••
'Who are you and how did you get in here?'

'I'm a locksmith. And, I'm a locksmith.'

- Leslie Nielsen
(as Lieutenant Frank Drebin, "Police Squad")

Lounging at the movies: Spun, Identity, Kill Bill and more

Identity: John Cusack, Ray Liotta, Amanda Peet, Rebecca De Mornay, Jake Busey and many more. How can you kill everybody, touch nobody and be really really crazy? We loved this film. Highly recommended.

Hollywood Homicide: Indiana Jones plays a homicide detective that is in a bit of a bad place in his life. He needs to make some money. He needs to solve a multiple homicide. He needs to sell a house and he needs to get layed. Cast includes Josh Hartnett, Dwight Yoacum and Martin Landau, etc. There are also many cameos including Lou Diamond Phillips and Eric Idle. Good fun with action.

Once Apon A Time In Mexico: Antonio Banderez, Johnny Depp, Selma Hieck, Mickey Rourke (again), Willem Defoe, Cheech Marin and Julio Iglesias' Son what's his name. A dark but funny sequel to Desperado. The Mariachi is called out of hiding and gets placed in the middle of a plan to take over the Mexican Government. There is more to the CIA's plan than meets the eye. The situation is taken care of in true Mariachi style. Recommended.

Kill Bill (vol. 1): Uma Thurman, Luci Liu, Daryl Hanna, and many more. Uma Thurman (an ex assassin survives her own assassination) is in town taking names and kicking ass. This ultra violent but humorous film is a lot of fun. There is fighting, fighting with guns, fighting with swords, fighting with knives, tables, cars, coffee mugs, cereal and a door. Highly recommended

B. K. Lounge Eats: Beef Barley Soup

Cooler days bring out the soup and stew recipes. Hearty food to warm you up before you resort to sipping a nice Brandy. Recently The B.K. Lounge test kitchen has prepared Beef Barley Soup. This wonderfully hearty soup contains all the necessary food groups;

Dairy Group, it has beef in it.
Grain Group, it has barley.
Vegetable Group, there are vegetables.
Beer Group, I put beer in it.

So not only is it hearty it is also healthy.

Ingredients:

• Olive Oil
• 1 1/2 pound of lean beef,
OOcut into bit size pieces
• 1 large onion, diced small
• 1 Red Bell Pepper, diced small
• 1 stalk celery, diced small
• 4 cloves Garlic, crushed and minced
• Pinch of Basil
• 3/4 teaspoon Rosemary
• Salt and Pepper
• 2 or 3 large Tomatoes, diced
• Tablespoon Beef bouillon
• 6 or 12 Chicory Stout
OODogfish Head beers or
OOyour favorite darker beer
• Tablespoon Worcestershire Sauce
• Water
• 1/2 pound Pearled Barley

In a large (iron if available) really hot stew pot add olive oil. When back to being really hot, brown the beef cubes. Remove beef to a bowl to use later.

Turn the heat down to saute and add some more oil and some butter if you want. Toss in the onion, red pepper, celery. Saute until onions are clear and maybe a little brown.

Toss in the garlic, basil, rosemary salt and pepper and stir slowly but constantly for a couple more minutes.

Add the tomatoes and bouillon and open a beer if you have not already done so and pour some into the pot. Stir to mix.

Add the worcestershire sauce and whatever else you want. We added carrots. Parsnips would be great along with tiny pieces of potato.

Add the beef you set aside earlier and add water until it resembles soup. Add some more water and bring to a boil.

Once boiling add the barley. Bring back to a simmer and cover. Simmer for 45 minutes. During this time tasty the soup and add salt and pepper as you see fit. Serve with toast and more beer.

Makes a lot of soup.

NOTICE:
Blind woman gets new kidney from dad she hasn't seen in years

Pigmy Hunter:
A hunter walking through the jungle found a huge dead elephant with a pigmy standing beside it. Amazed, he asked: "Did you kill that?"
The pigmy said, "Yes."
The hunter asked, "How could a little fellow like you kill a huge beast like that?"
"I killed it with my club".
The astonished hunter asked, "How big is your club?"
The pigmy replied, "There's about 60 of us."

Phobia Of The Month:
Aerophobia: Fear of drafts or air bourne noxious substances.

Warning: 10th annual chili, burrito and pickled egg eating contest - Nov.1

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©Bryan Knox, 2003
Designed and developed at Knox Laboratory