Lounge Cocktail:
Chimayo

Beware of cocktails that are hard to pronounce. You may not be able to order the third. We present this recipe in hopes that warmer weather will be coming soon.

« 3 parts tequila
« 1 part apple juice
« 1 part fresh lime juice

Fill a shaker with ice and add all of the ingredients. Shake and strain into a martini glass. Garnish with a slice of green apple if you like.

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Chicago Winter Parking:

Jay and his blonde wife live in Chicago. One winter morning while listening to the radio, they hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 3 to 4 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through." Jay's wife goes out and moves her car to the proper side of the street.

A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 4 to 5 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through." Jay's wife goes out and moves her car again to the proper side of the street.

The next week they are having breakfast again, when the radio announcer says "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park...", then the electric power goes out. Jay's wife says, "Honey, I don't know what to do." Jay says, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"

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"I love Thanksgiving turkey...it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts."

-Arnold Schwarzenegger

Lounging at the movies: The Hunted, Auto Focus, Ghost Ship

Auto Focus: Starring Greg Kinnear, Willem Dafoe. This movie sucked. Life can be depressing enough without watching this dude screw up everything he had.

The Hunted: Starring Benicio Del Toro (Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Usual Suspects) and Tommy Lee Jones ( Bunch O' Movies).

This is the story of a Blacks Ops. Soldier, trained by Tommy Lee Jones, that no longer recognizes the difference between apples and oranges. He is trained to go into hostile areas and "neutralize" the threat. He identifies the mark, does what he does, and leaves. The only problem now is that instead of seeing apples and oranges he sees apples and government controlled robots. The movie has a lot of hand to hand and hand to knife fighting and out of the pan and into the fire film. Recommended.

Ghost Ship: Starring Gabriel Burn and the nurse and ambulance driver from ER and some other people.

Salvage crew get a hot tip on a boat that is abandon and afloat in the Berring Straights. Worth millions in salvage they take off to see the bounty. The vessel is a cruise liner missing since 1962 or so and there is some suspicious things a goin' on. First off they find some newly dead bodies and a bunch of gold ingot. These are the kind of signs that say "GET THE HELL OFF THE BOAT". Because of situations beyond the control of the salvagers, guess what happens, they stay and have the mystery of the boat unfold before them.

This movie was not as scary as we though it was going to be and had kind of a Twilight Zone ending.

B. K. Lounge Eats: Bourbon Grilled Chicken

This recipe originally came to us from our friends at http://www.chicken-recipe.com. It was called Bourbon Grilled Chicken Orange Flavor. This confused us, was it bourbon or was it orange. We had to make an executive decision for flavor's sake. Knowing what we do about food we tossed out the orange flavor ingredients and focused on the bourbon. We all know bourbon is more fun than oranges anyway.

2 LB boneless skinless chicken breast ¾¾¾
1/2 cup chopped onion ¾¾¾¾¾
2 cloves garlic - minced ¾¾¾¾¾
1 Tblsp olive oil
1 Tblsp balsamic vinegar¾¾
1/3 cup bourbon whiskey ¾¾¾
1/4 cup molasses ¾¾¾ ¾¾¾
1/4 tsp. dry mustard ¾¾¾¾¾¾¾¾¾¾
salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste

First you must quality check the bourbon, if you can't drink it you should not be cooking with it. It is recommended that you stand clear of open flame when doing this.

Place the onion, garlic, olive oil, vinegar, whiskey, molasses (funny word), dry mustard, salt and pepper in a large heavy duty zip lock bag or bowl big enough to hold all ingredients.

Mix together and toss in the chicken. Marinate for at least 4 hours. Remove from marinade and grill, basting with marinade frequently.

Genie In A Bottle

A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a bottle. Picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a Genie appeared.

The amazed woman asked if she got three wishes. The Genie said, "Nope, sorry three-wish genies are a story-tale myth. I'm a one-wish genie. So...what'll it be?" The woman didn't hesitate. She said, "I want peace in the Middle East. See this map? I want these countries to stop fighting with each other and I want all the Arabs to love Jews and Americans and vice-versa. It will bring about world peace and harmony."

The Genie looked at the map and exclaimed, "Lady, be reasonable. These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I'm out of shape after being in a bottle for five hundred years. I'm good but not THAT good! I don't think it can be done. Make another wish and please be reasonable."

The woman thought for a minute and said, "Well, I've never been able to find the right man. You know, one that's considerate and fun, likes to cook and helps with the house cleaning, is great in bed and gets along with my family, doesn't watch sports all the time, and is faithful. That's what I wish for - a good man."

The Genie let out a long sigh, shook his head and said, "Let me see that freakin' map again."

Submitted by Kevin K., Mebane N. Carolina

NOTICE:
National PRAYER & FASTING conference.

The cost for attending the Fasting and Prayer conference includes meals.

Phobia Of The Month:
Gymnophobia: Fear of nudity.

I am naked right now.

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©Bryan Knox, 2003
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